I've made friends on solo trips and traveled to visit them. These relationships are just as valuable as local ones.
· Business Insider
Chelsia Durkee
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- A few years ago, I made three European friends while taking solo trips across the country.
- Recently, I returned to Paris and London to catch up with them, and had the best time.
- International friendships are just as important as local ones, even if we see each other less.
In 2024, I had the privilege of going on multiple solo trips to Europe.
On my very first night in London, sleep-deprived and high on my new adventure, I met a lovely local named Nora at a restaurant. We spent several weeks hanging out in London pubs, parks, and restaurants.
The following month, I met a Parisian solo traveler named Zoe on a Holocaust tour in Berlin, and we spent the next few days dancing in world-famous techno clubs together.
Finally, in December, I rang in the New Year with women solo travelers and locals in Lisbon. One of those Lisbon locals became my friend Martha, who was living in Paris but spending the holiday season at home.
When I solidified plans to head to Spain this year, I jumped at the chance to potentially extend my trip to Paris and London and reunite with my friends. After confirming they would be around, I booked my flights and accommodation for both cities.
We got to see Europe through each other's eyes
My Parisian friends and I took each other to places we otherwise may not have visited.Chelsia Durkee
I was technically in Paris alone, but from the start of the trip, I barely had a moment to myself.
As soon as I got off the train, I was on the phone with Zoe to coordinate plans. I thought it would be fitting to see a burlesque show together. After the show, we went dancing at Le Raidd, a popular gay club in Le Marais.
Zoe and I hadn't talked regularly since we had met, but it felt like no time had passed. We caught up on everything, from career moves to our families to our shared love of romance novels.
"I rarely go out in Paris," she said. I was a bit surprised. Based on our shared adventures in Berlin, I assumed that she was always hopping from one exotic adventure to the next.
The next evening, I met up with my other Parisian friend, Martha. We went to Sacré-Coeur, and since it was still chilly, there were barely any crowds. In typical Paris fashion, we wandered around gorgeous cobblestoned streets and talked for hours at Café Des Deux Moulins, a café made famous by the film "Amelié".
Though we were raised in completely different cultures, our mindsets around business, travel, and love were surprisingly similar. I learned that, contrary to some French stereotypes, many Parisians struggle with work-life balance. My friends also enjoyed hearing about my adventures and day-to-day life in California.
Martha told me it was refreshing to visit tourist attractions. She saw how excited I was over the red-adorned cafés, flower-lined archways, and artist stalls in Montmartre, and it energized her to see the city through rose-colored glasses.
She recommended a local French restaurant, La Cantine de la Cigale, where I experienced authentic duck confit on my own later that night. In a popular city like Paris, I appreciated getting local recommendations so I could try to avoid tourist traps.
After a week in Paris, I took the quick two-hour Eurostar train to London to meet with Nora.
Since I had less than 24 hours in the city, we spent the time revisiting our old haunts in Hackney, including my old Airbnb and the Sainsbury's grocery store I used to frequent. We even went back to the restaurant where we originally met.
My time in Paris and London reminded me how important these friendships are
I've learned that time spent together doesn't always dictate the strength of a relationship.Chelsia Durkee
Long-distance friendships can be harder to maintain than local ones, but I've developed more empathy, learned about new cultures, and tried different activities. I've also had the chance to get a taste of the local Parisian and London life, since my friends have brought me to hidden spots I wouldn't normally find on my own.
If I hadn't taken the risk of exploring Europe alone and putting myself out there with new people, I would never have made these connections — and now, I think my long-distance friendships are just as important as my relationships back home.
These friends have taught me that the strength of a friendship isn't always measured by time spent together.
Though we may only keep in touch sporadically, Nora, Zoe, and Martha know they can visit me anytime they're in San Francisco. I'm confident that because of our unique, shared memories, we can pick up right where we left off.
Solo travel has made me a better person in so many ways: I'm more open, kind, and vulnerable. I feel more resilient, and I care less about what others think.
Most of all, though, the international friendships have made my world feel more connected. I thank my friends — and all the future connections to come — for helping me call multiple cities home.
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